Someone asked me about my Christmas list and it isn’t even Thanksgiving, yet. I can’t remember the last time I had a “Christmas List”. I love the holidays, but I’m not about the presents. (I’m all about the egg nog, cookies, and spoiling the kiddos!) Thinking about the year I have had, I thought about some things that I could put on my Christmas list this year.
Because every 31-year-old elderly woman needs a drawer full of these. Not to mention, my list would be completely naked without them.
BLOOD GLUCOSE TEST STRIPS
Because every 31-year-old woman who is not diabetic needs to have these on hand at all times. Hopefully Santa’s elves are good at making these because he’ll have to sell Rudolph to pay for a pack of 25. They aren’t cheap. Nor are they something someone would open on Christmas morning and be so excited that they leave a yellow puddle of joy behind. Except for Melissa. She’d do that.
You should not get someone test strips for their blood sugar without stuffing their compression stockings FULL of Kit Kats. Christmas isn’t Christmas until someone’s blood sugar is 450 and they are passed out on the couch with A Christmas Story playing in the background.
I have come to realize that I just can’t have compression socks without some sandals to go along with them. The socks are probably slippery and I’ve already been in the ER five times this year and I don’t need any broken bones to add to my list of ailments.
I belong in this picture and that is all that needs to be said on that. Because I am working on a bottle of wine as I blog, I will say a bit more, though. My scooter would be decorated like a cop car, complete with lights and a siren, and I’d pretend to be chasing these two. The only reason I’d be a cop instead of something cooler is because then I’d have a box of donuts on my lap. You know, just in case my blood sugar drops, I’d be ready.